I am about to take a big step in my life in an effort to take my acting career to the next level; I am about to go from a full-time position at my day job to a part-time position. That's right folks. It is time and things are set in motion. I've been preparing for this and praying over it for a few months now. This isn't just some spontaneous decision.
I am super excited. My days will be open for auditioning and searching for auditions (the position consists of night shifts). And I will have a WHOLE extra day open for any possible acting job. I feel like not only will this help me to be more dedicated to acting, but I will also be able to be more focused at my regular job. I mean, less hours equals more energy right? Really though, I am tired of going into work and not being able to focus on my tasks because I am thinking about how much I need to step away ASAP and check Actors Access.
But I'd be lying if I said I am not anxious about this change, or even a little nervous. In my head I have gone over and over how much money I need to make in order to pay my half of the bills each month. I should be fine. I will just have to really cut down on dry cleaning and Starbucks. (I love getting my clothes dry cleaned: they come back looking brand new.) But the key word is should. This transition being still a few weeks away, I really don't know what it's gonna be like and that makes me nervous.
Of course, the goal is to get more paid acting work to help balance out the difference in income. I especially want to break into commercials this year, and when you are called in to audition for one, it is usually the next day. I don't feel comfortable meeting with commercial agents and casting directors if I know my daily work schedule will be an issue. Now I will be free to do more networking.
But what if I don't get any auditions? What if I get lazy with the extra time? Even though I get acting work pretty consistently right now, what if right when I have more time for it all of it ironically stops for me? These are all questions going through my mind at the moment and gripping me. Or rather they are fears.
That realization hit me while writing this post. These questions are fears. And I do not live my life according to fears. Yes, wondering whether or not you will be able to pay your bills is a valid concern, but when you are feeling the tug to do something, and the opportunity presents itself, you can not let questions and fears and the "what ifs" stop you. I have peace deep down, deeper than any emotion or feeling, that this is right thing for me at this moment.
Maybe I won't book anything for months. That happens. But I can't imagine that I will get lazy when it comes to making this career happen. (Hopefully not anyways; after all, I am not perfect.) I've come so far in the past couple of years. I know it won't be easy, but I feel that as long as I keep doing what I've been doing I should continue to move forward.
I am super excited. My days will be open for auditioning and searching for auditions (the position consists of night shifts). And I will have a WHOLE extra day open for any possible acting job. I feel like not only will this help me to be more dedicated to acting, but I will also be able to be more focused at my regular job. I mean, less hours equals more energy right? Really though, I am tired of going into work and not being able to focus on my tasks because I am thinking about how much I need to step away ASAP and check Actors Access.
But I'd be lying if I said I am not anxious about this change, or even a little nervous. In my head I have gone over and over how much money I need to make in order to pay my half of the bills each month. I should be fine. I will just have to really cut down on dry cleaning and Starbucks. (I love getting my clothes dry cleaned: they come back looking brand new.) But the key word is should. This transition being still a few weeks away, I really don't know what it's gonna be like and that makes me nervous.
Of course, the goal is to get more paid acting work to help balance out the difference in income. I especially want to break into commercials this year, and when you are called in to audition for one, it is usually the next day. I don't feel comfortable meeting with commercial agents and casting directors if I know my daily work schedule will be an issue. Now I will be free to do more networking.
But what if I don't get any auditions? What if I get lazy with the extra time? Even though I get acting work pretty consistently right now, what if right when I have more time for it all of it ironically stops for me? These are all questions going through my mind at the moment and gripping me. Or rather they are fears.
That realization hit me while writing this post. These questions are fears. And I do not live my life according to fears. Yes, wondering whether or not you will be able to pay your bills is a valid concern, but when you are feeling the tug to do something, and the opportunity presents itself, you can not let questions and fears and the "what ifs" stop you. I have peace deep down, deeper than any emotion or feeling, that this is right thing for me at this moment.
Maybe I won't book anything for months. That happens. But I can't imagine that I will get lazy when it comes to making this career happen. (Hopefully not anyways; after all, I am not perfect.) I've come so far in the past couple of years. I know it won't be easy, but I feel that as long as I keep doing what I've been doing I should continue to move forward.
awesome, keep up the good work!
ReplyDeleteThanks for reading and commenting April!! I hope you are well and wish you the best this year.
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